Log in

No account? Create an account

...I wAnT tO bE tRuE tO MySelF fOr YoUr SaKe...

♥♫♥yOu ArE mY lOvE_TVfXQ_yOu ArE mY SoUl♥♫♥

Previous Entry Share Next Entry
Heart's Battle
Title: Heart’s Battle

Length: oneshot

Rating: PG

Genre: drama, angst

Pairing: YunJae

Summary: Yunho chose to serve his country in hopes of a safer South Korea for his future family with Jaejoong. And in doing so, his husband was left alone in Seoul, waiting for him despite the ongoing war and the latter’s own doubts. Will the long years of being apart and having no contact with his other half drag the other away from his grasp?

Author: geenjae

Disclaimer: They're not mine.

“I’ll be back real soon, I promise.”

“You do know that what you’re about to do is suicide, right?”

“I know. But still, I’m doing this for you. For our future.”

“Yun, let’s just leave the country, huh? Just… You and me. Faraway from here.”

“I can’t Jae.”


“I love you. And when I get back, all this would be over and we’ll have a peaceful married life. I promise.”

“I believe you. I really do.”

“Then wait for me. No matter what, I’ll come back for you.”



Jaejoong’s eyes fluttered as the rays of the morning sun seeped through the white curtains on his lengthy windows. Still half awake, he walked towards the balcony, eyes sleepily taking in the sight of a very crowded Seoul. ‘When will you be one of them?’ he mentally asked to no one.

Finally had enough with the fresh air, he made his was way towards the bathroom before satisfying his stomach with a light breakfast.

As he walked out of his and Yunho’s apartment, he heard women whispering on the hallway. Although they were quiet enough with their own discussions, Jaejoong could still hear them. And they were talking about those things… again.

“Did you hear? Mrs. Han’s husband died on the field the other night.”

“Yeah. They said his corpse will be brought to their province. Busan, if I’m not mistaken.”

“And to think that out of all the families in this building, he’s already the 8th who has died during the battle.”

“I feel horrible to whoever is going to be the next widow. When will this war end?”

‘That’s right. I would also like to know the same thing. It has already been 3 months. When will this battle end? When are you coming back home?’ Jaejoong pushed his thoughts to the back of his mind as the elevator started descending, bringing him to the ground floor of the establishment.

As usual, the beautiful made went to work, did his grocery and made himself dinner once he got home. But all those while, he kept on silently praying for his lover’s safety and for that man to come back to him soon.

At night, he would cry himself to sleep. Worry would fill his senses and doubt would cloud his heart. ‘Is he even coming back? Is he still alive? I don’t know what to do. I can’t contact him and he’s not doing anything to reach me either. I don’t even know where he is! Or maybe… he has already… forgotten…? About me… the promises he made… the love we… shared? Yunho-ah, have you stopped loving me? Am I fighting a losing battle? I don’t know what to do… Yunho…’


3 years later…

“Yah! Come back here!”

“No way! Catch me first!”


Jaejoong ran as fast as he could to reach the running figure ahead of him. All the while, a happy smile was on his face as the other’s laughter reached his ears. That beautiful laughter, he can never get enough of it. It has been what he treasured the most for the past few years.

His running came to a sudden halt as the figure he was running after was approached by a tall man. He couldn’t recognize who that man was, nor has he seen him around whenever they went to that beach. And suddenly, worry filled his being. He immediately ran to his companion and picked the little boy up, turning away from the stranger and started walking away.

“Umma, who is he?” the boy pointed at the stranger who was looking at their direction.

Curious, Jaejoong turned around to glance at the man. “I don’t kno–”

“Jae…” the stranger whispered.

The beautiful man’s eyes widened as he recognized the man’s voice. That voice that has lulled him to sleep in the past, the voice that he has longed for – was the same voice that was calling out to him now.

“How have you been?”


“You still look the same. Although, more beautiful.”


“I’ve missed you. So much that– ”

“Three years,” Jaejoong finally spoke.


“Three damned years, Yunho. Why?” Jaejoong’s voice was trembling, obviously trying to hold back all his tears. He has been strong while the other man was gone. And now that the time has come when he has to be stronger, his walls had started crumbling down.

“I couldn’t. I badly wanted to, but I seriously can’t. The world there was crazy! You can’t imagine how–”

“No, I definitely can’t imagine it. I don’t even want to think about it!” Jaejoong shouted.

The sudden raise in Jaejoong’s voice startled the young boy in his arms. Never has he heard his umma yell nor even seen him at this state. And it scared hin – scared to the point that a bubble of hate towards the man in front of them has started to form.

“Umma…” the little boy started. He hugged his umma’s head that was now buried in his small chest as he patted the beautiful man’s hair. “Umma, please don’t cry. Binnie is here. Let’s go home, okay?”

“’Umma’?” Yunho voiced out. “Jaejoong… you… this kid…”

“Go away! I don’t want you to come near my Umma again! I hate you! I hate you! You made my Umma sad!”


Yunho kept on fidgeting on his sit, unable to decide if he’s feeling unwelcomed or he was actually afraid of facing the truth. Seeing that only a few things have changed, he sighed. The sofa was still the same as when he left. The television was still the same model and was still in the same place. The walls were still decorated with the same wallpaper.

He was brought back to the present when he heard a faint sound of a door closing. He immediately stood up, anxious to know what happened with the boy earlier.

“Sit back down. I’ll prepare some tea,” Jaejoong said and Yunho did what he was asked to do.

A few minutes later, Jaejoong came back with two cups of tea and placed them on the small coffee table. “Please help yourself,” he said as he sat down on the sofa, a few space separating him and the other man.

Silence filled the living room, nobody daring to talk.

“Moonbin’s asleep now,” Jaejoong started, thankful that he was finally able to get a hold of himself while he was lulling the kid to sleep. He needed to face Yunho sooner or later, and this time seemed to be the chance to do so.

“Moonbin… is he your son?” the taller asked, praying for the beautiful man to say ‘no’, tell him that it was all just a misunderstanding and he was still waiting for him.

“Yes, he is,” Jaejoong smiled as he sipped his tea.

Yunho felt his heart stop beating. He should’ve known. He couldn’t expect Jaejoong to wait for him that long. That’d be stupid. And there were a lot of people, both men and women, who’d desperately throw themselves at the beautiful man. He knows, because he was one of them. He was lucky enough that the angel returned his love. But stupid enough to continue counting the stars, not realizing that he has already lost the moon.

‘He has finally moved on. I should be happy for him. But I–”

“Why… didn’t you contact me… for three years…” Jaejoong whispered, not looking at the man he was talking to.

“I couldn’t. I wanted to, but I just didn’t have the guts to do so.” The taller man took the cup of tea on the table and took a sip, relishing the wonderful taste that only the tea that Jaejoong made would bring him.

“Please elaborate…?”

Yunho sighed. How can he tell his angel that he was too much of a coward to hear his voice? That if he did hear the angel’s voice, he’d have second thoughts on his own decision and run back home to the man he loves.

He wanted to prove himself – prove himself worthy of being the man that Jaejoong deserves. And in doing so, he knew that he has hurt the angel. Although unintentionally, he has caused the other such pain that it was already beyond repair. And he regretted it.

“I’m sorry…” he said as he placed his cup back on the table.

“Yunho, I asked you to elaborate, not apologize,” the beauty sighed.

“I… I just can’t! Okay?!”

The sudden raise on Yunho’s startled him, making him drop the cup in his hands.

Realizing what he has done, the taller man mentally smacked himself. “J-Jae, I–I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to. I–”

“It’s alright, Yunho.” Jaejoong picked up the cup on the carpet and cleaned up the spilled tea on it. All the while, the taller man only sat there, contemplating on his deeds.


Both men looked towards the direction where the voice came from and found Moonbin rubbing away sleep from his eyes with a stuffed deer in his arms. The boy was also holding on to a photo and this caught Jaejoong’s attention.

Finally having a good look at his surroundings, the boy immediately ran up to Yunho who startled when he was suddenly embraced by the boy.

“Appa!” the boy called him.

Confused, Yunho looked at Jaejoong with questioning eyes. Just awhile ago, the boy screamed at him. Claiming that he hated him. And now he was call him ‘appa’…?

“Appa, what took you so long? Umma and Binnie waited for you for years!” the boy said cheerfully.

“I-I’m your appa?” the taller man stuttered, pointing at himself

“Mm! Umma said you promised that you will come back. So Binnie waited for Appa with Umma. Umma said if Binnie becomes a good boy, Appa will be back home and wouldn’t have to go away anymore. That’s why Binnie did his best to be friends with the other kids and the Ajummas that always take care of Umma and Binnie,” the boy continued.

“B-But… you said you hate–”

“Oh! Minnie’s sorry about that, Appa! I just recognized that it was you awhile ago when I looked at this photo in my room. See?” The little boy showed Yunho a photo of both his Umma and his Appa. And indeed, it was Jaejoong and him in the photo. It was the one they took on the last Valentine’s Day they spent together.

“So, does this mean Appa is staying? I promise I will continue to be a good boy and–”

“Moonbin…” the beautiful man spoke.

Both Yunho and Moobin turned their heads and looked at Jaejoong. The beautiful man had tears flowing down his cheeks as his hand was covering his lips, stopping himself from sobbing.

The taller man finally understood everything. He stood up from the couch and approached the crying angel behind him. He enveloped him in a warm embrace and placed the latter’s head on his chest. He kissed the top of the man’s head as he tightened his hold on him and whispered ‘I’m sorry. I’m so so sorry.’

Jaejoong, still unable to stop his tears, wrapped his arms around the other’s waist and buried his face deeper into his lover’s chest. “I missed you so much~ You didn’t even call~” came his muffled whine. He looked up and found the taller man’s face inches from his, staring into his hazel brown orbs.

“I love you,” the tanned man whispered before his bow-shaped lips came in contact with the other’s plump ones.

The kiss was sweet and gentle. It showed how much love they had for each other despite the longing and heartbreak they faced throughout the past few years they were apart.

Then, the beautiful man felt a soft tug on his pants and parted his lips from his husband’s. The two men looked down and found Moonbin looking up at them. Jaejoong smiled and immediately picked the young boy up, carrying him in his arms as they both faced Yunho.

“Baby, do you have something to say to Appa?” Jaejoong cooed at the boy.

Moonbin looked at his umma and then his appa before smiling beautifully at Yunho. He reached out his short arms towards the taller man’s face, motioning for him to carry him. When the man took him from his umma’s arms, he wrapped his arms on the man’s neck, holding on tightly.

“Welcome home… Appa.”


note: I hope i didn't confuse anyone with this one. if there are anyone questions, i'd be more than happy to answer them^^

thank you for reading!!! ^__^
and please do leave a comment^^


This is so sweet , yunjae is together at the end ^^

you're the first reader!
thank you for reading!

yay!! YunJae, finally :'D *happy*~

yay for yunjae family reunion..poor jae need to be strong raising binnie by himself..but it's ok, yun is back finally..hehehe :D

yep, yun's back for his hubby~ =333
thank you for reading!

i like thissssssssss <3
so jaejoong is pregnant? XD ah it's so sad that jae take care of their son alone. but they together again afterall :)

yeah, he got pregnant from their 'special night' before yun left for the army so yun had no idea that we was pregnant that time.
thanks for reading^^

(Deleted comment)
i agree...
anyway, thanks for reading ^__^

woow~ this is great!
at first yes it was sad but then i was going all crazy with the fluff XD

thanks for sharing! ^^

thanks for reading ^-^

Aww I'm so happy yunjae got together in the end..
I was worried this will be an angsty end..

Thx for writing ^^

i was thinking of an angsty ending...
but i can't make one at the moment...
i need inspiration for one XD
thanks for reading, btw =3

(Deleted comment)
awwwwwww. that was sweet ^^

Awww YunJae are finally reunited~
So sweet and beautiful^^
I love it! Thx for sharing :)

True love always finds its way back ♥

i agree =3
thanks for reading^^

Gyaaaa!!! This is a beautiful fic! I cried so much! I'm so happy that they reunited in the end!

you cried?
seriously? awww... =))

hehe =3
thank you for reading~

(Deleted comment)
(Deleted comment)
well, the story started where jae and yun are already married...
they're already husband and... husband =P

(Deleted comment)
(Deleted comment)
(Deleted comment)